Bonnie and I met at a dance at the college in Rangely Colorado. It was fall at the beginning of the school year. I asked her to dance and it was Love at first sight for both of us. One thing that always impressed me was how
clean and perfect her shirt or collar was as can be seen in the picture below. I noticed that first thing during our first dance and it is burned into my memory. I guess that is because it was a reflection of who Bonnie was. I don't why but that was one of several moments frozen in time in my memory.
Over the next few months we spent a lot of time together.We both had some extra baggage to deal with.She still had some connection to a boyfriend in Alaska. I had been hurt in the recent past in a relationship which added some guarded reluctance. Those circumstances however could not stop the natural attraction and magnetism.
I remember taking her to the airport she was going to Alaska for Thanksgiving. Us both sitting there talking.The uneasy feeling of not wanting to separate even for a short period of time.
Another moment frozen in time was when I was returning her to the residence hall and we were embracing and she looked at me and said " how do you tell someone that you love them?" . I said I guess you just tell them. We both said that we loved each other that evening . We had said it before but she was raising the level of intensity and sincerity.Looking back I think she was trying to get me past that fear and reluctance. Trying to convince me that I could trust her.
Bonnie went to Denver area with her roommate for Christmas break.I had returned to the campus or had been there as I worked the oilfield while going to school.We received word that there had been an accident with some students just outside of town. It didn't register at first that Bonnie was involved. Arriving at the scene . I had a spotlight that you could plug into the cigarette lighter . We shined the light over where Gordon Brown had been thrown out of the jeep. From my experience in Vietnam I knew he was dead.The Jeep had rolled down the embankment so I worked my way down to Bonnie. Soon the ambulance arrived down in the field below.
Bonnie and I talked and I tried to comfort her. I rode in the Ambulance to the Hospital with her . She said that she was cold and of course we told each other how much we loved each other.At the hospital she told me that she was scared and wanted me to stay with her.I said that they were going to take care of you. I thought that being that we had been talking that she would be okay.
It wasn't that long and they came out and said that she did not make it.I felt like thousands of needles were sticking me all over my body. I got up and went out the front doors . A highway patrolman asked if I was okay.I drove to the dorm .Some of the details I don't remember some are frozen in time.
Though our time together was brief. Our Love lives on. For years I never dealt with her death. Often over the past 44 years my thoughts have flashed back to our time together.Also I have carried a lot of guilt that I have not dealt with.
Had I taken her to my grandmothers house for Christmas all could have turned out differently. I was headed in the direction of asking her to be a permanent part of my life.She has become a permanent part of my life though not in the physical sense.
Over the past year of 2014-15 I have felt her presence growing . Which has led me to going to Alaska this summer
to visit her grave site and meet her family . I only met her Dad and spent some time with him when he came down to Colorado to take Bonnie home.After that I ran away from dealing with her death.I also cheated the family out of possible closure that I may have been able to provide. I'am truly sorry that I did that .
I LOVE YOU BONNIE
To be continued
It has been decided that this story will continue with inserted notes on recent and future experiences. Here are some examples that will be in the story line soon.
I think it may be that they are reaching out to me maybe more than me to them . It is hard to tell for sure but actually I'am enjoying it.
Similar instances of what is happening now have happened to me over the years several times.It has happened where I ended up in circumstances where at a certain point . I would ask myself " how the hell did I get here".
It is to a degree like that you are not the only one in control . Like someone else is driving and your the passenger seat.
Date: June 5, 2015 at 12:25:06 PM MDT
To: pat <email@example.com>
Subject: Journal 6/5/2015
Sent from my iPad
Going over wolf creek pass this morning on the downside.Bonnie driving in a sense. Thinking of these voices (thoughts) as to validity .Started to listen to all songs on iPod . On comes Moody Blues THE VOICE . I we listen and as I do often I don't really hear the words.The song ends and I'am ready to move on to the next song. But that voice ( thoughts) Bonnie says Play it again . I'am inclined not to but give in to her persistence .She says now listen to the words.
the key words in the lyrics are;Make a promise take a vow
And trust your feelings it's easy now
Understand the voice within
And feel the changes already beginning
And how many words have I got to say
And how many times will it be this way
With your arms around the future
And your back up against the past
Decided to listen to Moody Blues and listen to the voice once more as I often do .wear the song out .Next song that came up I KNOW YOURE OUT THERE SOMEWHERE .Random WOW. The key part of the lyrics being;
the words that I remember
From my childhood still are true
That there's none so blind
As those who will not see
And to those who lack the courage
And say it's dangerous to try
Well they just don't know
That love eternal will not be denied
experiences lately have been the most exhilarating of my life.Also has given me new perspective relative to an Enigmatic Puzzle I've been trying to make sense of for years.The story continues
We have not evolved too Genius. We have had some help along the way. Which has been a collaboration of those in this Dimension and those in another.
"Specifically relating to recent events . The "voices (thoughts)" have not just been one event but a series of events over the last month or so.It has been a process of amazement followed by doubt and then events of confirmation or validation." Quote from new Page (Ultimate Enigmatic Puzzle).
Referencing the enigmatic puzzle . I have mentioned other similar situations as I have experienced with similarities too the past month and 1/2 . If one goes to the Enigma Mac page album there is some documentation that can give a hint as to how many stories are within the story. To mention two (1) ask CBS News who was the inspiration for "America on the Line" Bush Sr. State of the union coverage.(2) I met with Gen Graham in Denver subject launch systems of nukes initial launch hidden from detectability. There are more.
Relative to the Enigmatic Puzzle "America On The Line" CBS. I sent a message to Charles Kuralt at CBS in that year. I have the receipts . The message was sent in a unusual manner. Those who were there during this time would remember.Days later they announced coverage never done before during and after the state of the Union address . My point was that if given an opportunity to respond and be heard the American people would respond .i was more than right.They presented it different than I did visualized it.which I can or will cover later . The curious thing is that with such an over whelming response they dropped it . Obviously Political and to this day the American People are the losers. They never contacted me. I would suggest getting the footage of news prior to during and after and I could take one step by step through the events.
Relative to Gen. Graham in possible interests of National Security I will remain silent for the time being.
trip was 5-27-2015
Subject: Trip to Rangely
Date: Thu, 28 May 2015 09:21:06 +0000
Special note # on my way back from Rangely I was having trouble figuring out the accident scene. Later near the power Plant near craig I stopped and I had a different experience. Bonnie's presence being explained to me and rose to a new level . Bonnie entering my body and us becoming one.